Gauntlet: Chapter 4

Lilah sat back on her heels and grinned. “We’re just getting to know each other better.”

“What are you doing with that damn mask?” Britt closed the door behind her.

Clio tossed it aside in distaste. “I was asking her where she got it. She, of course, just made a joke of it.”

“Can I help it if she doesn’t have a sense of humor?” Lilah appealed to Britt. “She thinks I’m a prowler.”

“I didn’t say that!” Clio snapped, loud enough that she flushed. “I just…said it wouldn’t surprise me if you were!”

Britt frowned. “She’s not a prowler,” she said with finality. She sat down and began to pick through the pile of cans.

“How do you know?” Clio asked sharply.

“She’s been around awhile. She’s helped me. We’ve helped each other.”

Clio’s indignation deflated. She awkwardly scooted out from under Lilah, avoiding eye contact.

So Britt had known Lilah longer. Clio’s chest tightened as a feeling of resentment swelled up inside her. Britt had never mentioned Lilah to her. Why not? Were there other acquaintances in here who might show up one day?

Clio ducked her chin, taking a quick peek at Lilah under the pretense of tucking hair behind her ears. Lilah watched Britt, a small smile playing about her lips. Britt threw Lilah an exasperated look, but the hint of a smile was there, too.

Some sort of communication seemed to pass between them. Lilah sighed and slid her eyes to Clio.

“Sorry. I was just messing around.”

The jealousy she’d been trying to suppress surged up strong in Clio.

“So where did you get it?” Clio snapped.

Lilah reclined back on her elbows. “It was a gift.”

“A gift? From who?”

“Let’s just say, I…have friends in unusual places.”

Clio glanced at Britt, but her expression was impassive. Clio frowned.

“Are you saying you’re friends with the prowlers?” Clio asked defensively.

“No.” The heart-shaped earring twirled when Lilah shook her head. “I’m saying I have a mutually…beneficial relationship…with one of them.” A grin full of innuendo spread across her face, and she leaned closer to add a conspiratorial air.

It took a moment for Clio to digest that. And when did, she grimaced. An image of Lilah and a black-masked figure writhing together in some dark cell flashed into her mind with horrifying clarity. Clio banished it as quickly as she could, trying to scrub the evidence from her brain.

As much as Lilah got on her nerves, she couldn’t imagine anyone willing to put themselves in prowler hands. It seemed so…so insane…and kind of sick. Hopefully, they used a bed, at least? A clean one. Even Lilah deserved that much.

It suddenly struck Clio that there were real people under those masks, and she wondered for the first time how prowlers ended up in their positions.

Lilah’s self-satisfied expression seemed to indicate that she didn’t find her…liaisons distasteful. Clio grimaced again.

“How did you even meet?” she asked in horrified fascination.

“Ran into him when I was caught out late once.” Lilah shrugged. “He was alone. And lonely. I helped him out with that.”

Clio’s blush seemed to amuse her. “Don’t worry–he’s really cute. The next time I see him, I could ask if he has a friend for you.”

Not deigning to respond to that, Clio turned to Britt. “This doesn’t bother you?” Clio asked. “Did you know about it?”

Britt didn’t reply for a moment, but she exchanged another look with Lilah. The feeling of being left out hit Clio again.

“Everyone deals with this place in their own way,” Britt said carefully.

“What’s the big deal, anyway?” Lilah rolled up to a sitting position. “Are you that big of a prude?”

“It’s not that!” Clio cried angrily. “How can we trust you if–“

For the first time, Lilah didn’t look amused. “I don’t care if you trust me or not, Princess. I’ve done what I had to—to keep myself fed, to get protection and information. Plus, I’m getting laid on a regular basis. Are you?”

“Stop teasing Clio,” Britt interjected. She tried to sound stern, but Clio could hear the amusement underneath it.

How could Britt take this so lightly?

“Are you really sure you can trust her?” Clio demanded. “She’s actually bragging about knowing one of those creeps who grabbed us!”

As Britt began to respond, Lilah’s needling voice overrode her.

“Let’s turn that around. How trustworthy are you, Princess?”

Clio stared, taken aback by the question. She finally mustered a bit of indignation. “I haven’t done anything to show I’m not!”

“Oh, really?” Lilah sneered. “Then why are you getting all this special treatment? You get fancy new clothes, a real bed, fresh food, a map with a way marked on it, and from what you say, all wrapped in a pretty bow just for you. How do we know you aren’t playing us?”

Clio was speechless. She stared at Lilah for several seconds.

“But I’m not.” Finally, Clio looked to Britt. “Britt,” she entreated. “You don’t believe that, do you?”

Lilah leaned forward, her eyes gleaming. “Think about it. She’s asking all these questions. Maybe she’s trying to get information to use against us, or against my friend. He’d be in big trouble if someone found out he was helping me.”

“I’m not doing that!” Clio’s fists clenched. A hot flush of helplessness and anger made her tremble. She didn’t know how to defend herself from this. She had no way of proving anything she said.

Lilah scoffed. Clio felt hot tears prick at the corners of her eyes.

“That’s enough.” Britt’s voice was sharp. “You’re both acting like idiots, and you’re driving me crazy.”

“But–“

“I know you’re not some secret agent, Clio.” Britt rolled her eyes. “Seriously, you’re probably a horrible liar. You wear your feelings all over your face.”

Clio frowned. That stung a little.

“Lilah knows you’re not, too,” Britt continued. “She’s just yanking your chain.”

“Yeah, I was just messing with you, Clio.” Lilah’s plump cheeks dimpled as she offered Clio a fake smile. “You should be used to that.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“How long did the prowlers have you?”

“Not…not that long,” Clio replied, her voice wavering.

“But long enough.” Round shoulders rose in a sympathetic shrug, and Lilah relaxed back into her lounging pose. “So they probably fucked with you a little.”

A sick feeling twisted Clio’s stomach. “What are you saying?”

“Oh, don’t worry. I’m just talking about a quick little mind fuck. That’s what all this is, isn’t it? One big mental fuckfest?”

“That’s enough, Lilah.” Britt shot Lilah a warning glare.

“No, I want to know what she means.” Clio’s voice sounded high-pitched to her own ears, even through the thick blood that surged behind her eardrums.

The voices…Clio already knew, didn’t she? She already knew what Lilah meant. She’d forgotten most of it, and pushed the rest deep down so she wouldn’t have to think about it. But she knew.

Her hand crept up to the curve of her neck and shoulder. Fingertips pressed into flesh that had been tender for days, but had only bloomed with a colorful purple bruise that morning.

Oh, Clio tried to tell herself it was just a bruise from being manhandled, but she knew. The tiny sting as they’d dragged her away from Britt. And there was a matching bruise on her arm, with a tiny red dot in the center. She couldn’t remember as clearly how she got that one, but she couldn’t pretend anymore. They were from injections.

They had done things to her mind.

The blood in her face rushed downward, chilling her momentarily. What had they done? Not knowing was unbearable, but knowing might be worse. She already felt deeply tainted. Her vision tunneled as a rising sense of hysteria and vulnerability bubbled up within her.

Distantly, she watched Lilah’s face change from amusement to something like alarm. Clio wasn’t sure why. Britt was saying her name urgently. Lilah shot up to her knees, her brightly colored bangs flopping over one eye.

Clio felt a muted pain in her arms when Britt grabbed her and shook her, eclipsing her view of Lilah. Clio stared into Britt’s mismatched eyes. A shudder wracked her body; the blinding light faded to a more bearable intensity.

Blue and brown, Clio thought. No, it’s actually more of a hazel. This close, she could see the flecks of green and gray mixed into those eyes. It was kind of cool.

“Clio!”

Clio blinked. An awareness of her body and her surroundings hit with sudden force. She sucked in a breath and stiffened in Britt’s grip.

Oh, God. She’d almost fainted. The blood flooded her cheeks this time, and she pulled away from Britt’s hands with an embarrassed mutter.

“I-I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?” Britt demanded.

Clio nodded, folding her shaky arms around her body. She closed her eyes and tried to reach past the fuzzed-out patches that blocked shadowy faces and words. But she still came up with nothing…just the pricks of the injections and the fleeting, fading sound of soft laughter.

She exhaled and looked up at Britt and Lilah. “Am I going to end up like one of those…those walking lobotomies?” she whispered.

“No.” Britt released her. “That won’t happen to you.”

Clio ignored Britt and focused on Lilah. “You’ve got the connections, right?” she asked bitterly. “Is that what they’re going to do to me?”

Lilah had the grace to look a little chagrined. She sounded much less confident when she answered, “I…no…I don’t think so.”

“Calm down and think about it.” Britt squeezed Clio’s shoulder. “You’re still you. You don’t feel any different from when you first got here, right? You’re not having crazy thoughts, right?”

After a moment, Clio gave a hesitant nod.

“I don’t feel any different,” she murmured. “But what if–“

Britt shook her head. “No ‘what ifs.’ Just think about what you can see and feel for yourself. Besides, you haven’t started drooling yet, have you? You’re not shuffling through the halls like a zombie flick refugee.”

An unwilling smile tugged at the corners of Clio’s lips. But it swiftly faded as heaviness settled in her gut.

“Sometimes I think it’s only a matter of time,” Clio said quietly.

To Clio’s surprise, Lilah sighed. “Look,” she muttered. “I didn’t mean to freak you out.”

“Right,” Clio said flatly. Britt’s expression also implied complete disbelief, which made Clio feel a bit better.

“Well, maybe a little, but that was just because you were being such a snotty–“

“Lilah.” This time a line of steel ran through the exasperation in Britt’s voice. Lilah threw up her hands.

“I’m just saying,” Lilah insisted. “I’m willing to get over this if she is.”

“Fine,” Clio said quickly, surprising even herself. “I just want to get out of this in one piece, so I…I hope we can get along and figure out how to get out of here together.”

She stuck her hand out, enjoying the stunned looks on both their faces. Lilah shook her hand, uncharacteristically silent.

Then Clio withdrew from the conversation. She wanted to think about the missing chunk of time before she woke up cuffed to the bed. If she could make sense of the swirl of impressions she had, it might tell her something. Her fingers absently fiddled with the charms of her bracelet.

And regardless of what they thought, she wasn’t giving up on getting back to the theater wing. It was the only place she had found any sort of real answers. It was the only place that had given her hope.

 

The uneasy truce held for a few days. Lilah had mellowed, or maybe Clio had, because Clio began to relax a little in her company. She even occasionally enjoyed the girl’s perverse sense of humor. In any case, Lilah took off for long periods of the day, doing who knew what, so Clio spent a lot of time with only Britt for company.

That suited her just fine. Britt agreed that they should push forward, deeper into the Gauntlet than they’d ever been before–even if it meant losing access to familiar waypoints and the few irreplaceable luxuries, like the pool. Britt admitted that she’d gotten complacent. She’d needed the push from Clio.

What made Clio happiest was Britt’s decision to explore what Clio thought of as her wing. They hadn’t convinced Lilah yet, but Britt didn’t seem worried. She was more concerned with the logistics of moving her supply caches to new locations.

That project had taken up most of the day. Lilah had disappeared soon after waking up, which irked Clio a little, but she and Britt made good progress alone. In one more day, Clio could say goodbye to those drab hallways. The new territory looked similar, but at least Clio was moving forward. And the idea of that elusive exit she’d glimpsed hung like an invisible carrot over her head.

While returning to their safe room that day, Clio heard hushed voices before she even touched the door. Britt and Lilah had returned before her. In the quiet murmurs that drifted through the slightly open doorway, the sound of Clio’s own name gave her pause.

She couldn’t resist the temptation to eavesdrop. She quietly pressed up against the wall and peeked through the crack in the door.

Britt and Lilah were crouched down furtively, looking at something Clio couldn’t see. Clio only made out brief snatches of words.

“…humor her…”

“…trigger again…”

A hot flush raged against Clio’s cheeks.

Lilah laughed, and to Clio’s ear, it sounded mocking. Her gut twisted a little when Britt chuckled, too.

Clio tried to harden her expression. She pushed the door open and entered with a fake grin. She pretended she didn’t notice when they stood up and moved away from each other a little too quickly.

“Guess what I found in the pocket of some old overalls?” Clio announced.

The women practically attacked her for the pack that held only a few stale cigarettes. If not for the scene she’d just observed, Clio would have been amused by their excitement and pleased to be providing the coveted treat. Now it was just a good excuse to send them away until they’d smoked them.

Clio curled up and pretended to be asleep before they returned. Given the awkward state of her feelings, she just hoped things sorted themselves out in the morning.

She really should have known better.

***

“It’s gone.”

Clio stared at the few contents of her bag, strewn on the floor around her knees. Her mind raced through the last few days.

No, she thought. I put it back. She was sure of it.

“What’s gone?” Britt asked from across the room.

Clio felt her eyes blaze furiously as she looked up at Lilah.

“The map,” Clio snapped. “It was in here and now it’s gone.”

“Clio…” Britt warned.

“Give it back,” Clio interrupted. Her gaze didn’t waver from Lilah. “I know you took it, so give it back.”

Lilah laughed in a scornful little huff. “What would I want with it?” she drawled. “It’s useless. Except as some weird security blanket for you.”

Hot anger surged through Clio. She was beyond pissed off. She felt almost incandescent with rage, but a strange sort of calm before the storm kept her voice even.

“Give it back,” she said one more time.

Lilah’s pale, round face mocked her, her eyes wide with overdone innocence. “I told you–I don’t have it.”

Clio rose in one smooth movement. For once, Lilah’s brash presence seemed diminished, and Clio relished the charge her anger was building. Surprise flickered across Lilah’s face, wiping away the smirk that taunted Clio.

The satisfaction kept Clio from exploding.

“What did you do with it?”

“Nothing! I haven’t seen it since the last time you dragged it out to obsess over.”

Britt stepped in quickly. “Are you sure you didn’t leave it somewhere?”

“Yes!” Clio snapped.

“Whatever. I don’t have it.” Lilah shrugged, which made Clio seethe.

Clio shrugged off Britt’s hand and glowered down at Lilah. “I know you’re lying!” she shouted. “It didn’t just disappear! You took it because…”

“It’s a useless piece of trash,” Lilah shot with a sneer.

“You…you never even cared that it showed a way out, did you? You probably just threw it out because there’s something really freaking wrong with you!” Clio’s fists trembled with fury. “Your little romance with a prowler proves that.”

“Poor Clio,” Lilah mocked. “Now your jealousy’s screwing with your brain. Maybe if you lightened up a little, a stupid piece of paper wouldn’t matter so much to you.”

“Lighten up?” Clio cried. ”It was a map! For this prison! It’s almost like you want to–“

Clio’s eyes widened abruptly, and her mouth hung open. After a moment, Clio expelled a harsh breath and fixed Lilah with an incredulous glare.

“You don’t want to get out,” Clio accused shakily.

Instead of defending herself, which Clio had hoped she would, Lilah shrugged.

“So what?”

Icy dread clawed Clio’s heart. Her vision blurred as blood flooded her face.

“So what? So what? You’re out of your mind!” Clio swallowed bile. “And even if you…you like it in here doesn’t mean we all want to be stuck here forever!”

Lilah laughed in her face. “Why not? Would you rather be working at some dull job all day? Living some average, boring little life? I do like it here. I’m not ashamed of it.”

“How…” Clio shook her head in disgust.

“Because I’m not afraid. Because I like the thrill–not knowing what’s around the corner, having to live by my wits. No one to tell me what to do or how to be. There’s food, a roof over my head, and even a little romance.” Lilah accompanied that barb with a mocking arch of her brow. “If you have the guts to chase it down.”

Clio sucked in a harsh breath. For a moment, a tiny piece of her could almost sympathize.

But the rest of her, the vast majority of her, smothered that thought. The Gauntlet revolted every reasonable sense in her body.

“You…you have no right to make that choice for me,” she hissed at last.

“Right. Because Princess Clio is so special.”

“Don’t call me that!”

“Enough!” Britt stepped in again. “This is going nowhere. Clio, I don’t think Lilah took the map. Whatever happened to it, it’s not important now–“

Clio turned away, cutting Britt off mid-sentence. Her eyes searched the room until she found Lilah’s tattered bag; she made a beeline for it. She ignored Lilah’s outraged cry as she flipped the bag upside down.

Nail polish bottles in a variety of wild shades clattered on the floor. One bottle of neon green rolled across the floor and hit the baseboard. Clio sorted through the pile, much larger than what her own bag yielded: a lighter, cosmetics, a comb, a foil packet of potato chips, and other odds and ends.

There was no map.

Clio’s chin dropped to her chest, and she stifled a dry sob.

“Clio.” Britt’s cautious voice drifted from the other side of the room.

Lilah, on the other hand, stomped over to the mess. She dropped to her knees beside Clio and sneered.

“Find what you were looking for?”

Clio flushed. “You know I didn’t, but that doesn’t mean anything.”

“You’re really an assho–“

“STOP IT!” Britt’s roar made them both jump.  “Lay off, Lilah!”

Lilah’s face screwed up, but she didn’t say anything else. Clio felt a surge of validation.

Until Britt went on. “And Clio,” Britt added. “You’re being unfair.”

Indignation flared in Clio’s chest. “I am?” she cried. “Why wouldn’t I think she took it? We all know she’s constantly screwing with me!

Britt shook her head in weary irritation. “You need to get over it,” she murmured. “If the map’s gone, it’s gone. Making a big production won’t change anything.”

“Fine!” Clio lashed out, an unbearable tightness in her chest and throat. “Maybe you don’t really want to get out of here, either!”

“That’s not true. You’re being ridiculous.”

“You both act like I’m the crazy one for wanting to find a way out! Well…well…” Clio’s shrill stammer wavered. “Then I’ll go off on my own. I’m sure I can remember most of the map, anyway. I’m not giving up. This place sucks!”

And so do you the both of you!

Ignoring Britt’s stricken expression, Clio shoved her things together and stormed out. Britt didn’t come after her.

That fact kept Clio moving, even when the indignation had fizzled and she’d calmed down. She obviously hadn’t expected Lilah to chase her, but Britt? She’d hoped Britt would try to talk her out of storming off.

Maybe Britt didn’t really want Clio around now that she had Lilah. Maybe Britt was happy Clio had made it so easy on them by leaving on her own.

Clio was too angry to focus on her surroundings, but her feet took back toward the blocked wing. Her thoughts were filled with wild plans to fall back on if she couldn’t get through. She could take the prowler mask from Lilah and sneak back into the basement, passing herself off as one of them. If she found the room she’d been chained in, she could climb the shaft again and get back to the new wing that way.

Unfortunately, she had no idea how to get back to the basement room. Britt would. Lilah probably did. Clio sniffed. That little snake probably knew all about prowler territory.

Clio entertained herself with the fantasy of sneaking around in disguise, navigating enemy territory with bold daring. A vision of herself emerging triumphant again into the light of the sun and the choice of the four hallways was intensely gratifying. As far-fetched as it was, it did make her feel better.

So much so that she barely hesitated when she was forced to navigate the dark service shaft on hands and knees. She didn’t have a flashlight, because she’d stupidly left behind the one Britt had given her. But Clio had been through the small shaft a few times–she knew the length of it. Her residual anger helped cage her instinctual fear of the narrow space.

She was making good time, fueled by adrenaline and purpose, until about halfway through. She stopped abruptly.

What?

Clio looked over her shoulder, though it was utterly black in the shaft. She strained to hear…whatever it was she thought she’d just heard.

A whisper? A glide of fabric on rough metal? The muted slap of scrambling hands?

Was Britt following her, after all?

Proceed to Chapter 4, page 3–>